During the early years of transition, I struggled through knowing how to answer questions regarding being transgender. As a result of feeling uneducated, I dived into the online world to research as much about the topic as possible. Here are the top 10 things I believe everyone should know about being transgender.

1. Sexual orientation is different than gender identity

For example, I identify as female. That doesn’t mean I’m obligated to like men. Many transwomen have and continue to date women throughout there transition. I personally do like men, one specific man to be exact. Never make that assumption for them; let people be themselves.

2. Transgender women are not the same as drag queens

The difference between transgender and drag queens is that Drag Queens put on makeup, hair, and outfits with the intent to impersonate being a woman, typically for the purpose of putting on a show. I, as a transgender woman, do not put on makeup, hair, and nails to go out and entertain as a female impersonator.

3. Slurs

Some of the more common slurs are “tranny, he-she, transvestite, shemale, shim”, and the majority of trans women will take offense to these terms.

4. It’s called transitioning

An all-encompassing term used to describe someone’s process of becoming their desired self. This process can include but is not limited to: changing pronouns, starting to dress differently, surgeries, name change, or any of the other stages someone has identified as a part of their transition.

5. Pronouns

It’s ok to ask about pronouns. The worst thing you could do to a transgender person is to use the wrong pronoun. Now I understand that people are going to mess up and there can be problems. But if someone is going to ask you to recognize them as he or she then try to show them respect by using that term. I would prefer someone to ask instead of guessing and making it feel like a personal attack.

6. Insurances

A lot of insurance companies are covering surgeries/treatments like sexual reassignment surgery (SRS) and hormone replacement therapy (HRT). If you’re considering any surgery – it’s worth calling the company to see what they will cover. You might just get lucky!

7. What are the initials MTF and FTM stand for?

FTM stands for Female to Male while MTF stands for Male to Female. I am MTF meaning at birth I was identified as Male and now I identify as female (FTM is the reverse).

8. Is there a difference between cross-dressing and being transgender?

Yes, there’s a big difference. Cross-dressing is when a person enjoys the act of wearing feminine clothing, accessories and/or makeup that’s not socially associated with their gender identity. Generally, people who cross-dress are comfortable with their biological sex and do not wish to be identified as the opposite sex. Cross-dressing is a form of gender expression, not gender identity or sexual orientation. Makeup, clothing, and hair do not have a gender.

9. Do all people who transition have surgery?

Most people do have surgeries like sexual reassignment surgery (SRS). Not all will or want to. Just because you identify as female does not mean you must have surgery. Many transgender cannot afford to spend tens of thousands of dollars on surgery and many don’t want to change their genitals. Undergoing SRS can change your sexual arousal, drive, and sensitivity. Which all can be very scary to possibly say goodbye to.

10. Gender markers

A gender marker can be found on your Drivers License, Passport, and Social Security (SSN). All of which can be changed in most states with a letter from a doctor or therapist. When it comes to your birth certificate, the only people able to change your gender is the state in which you were born. Most require you to have had sexual reassignment surgery (SRS) surgery to apply for the changing of the birth certificate gender. But in some cases, like mine, a state will not allow any gender changes to a birth certificate for any reason.

Through learning these items, I hope you’ve seen how socially there are quite a few challenges trans individuals face. Building a support network is challenging. If someone you know is transgender make sure they know you’re there for them and accept them for who they are. Does someone you know need to know some of the information above? Share this article! The only way to change the world is through educating.